Our Story | Fostering with Fibromyalgia

Fibromyalgia

Nov 18, 2025 4:17 PM

As I have stated it was a few years journey for me to find out what was going on with me. And some of those years were really tough. Starting with losing my mom, then not long after my back surgery my daughter, Brit, decided to move to Georgia. That was really tough. My entire world changed. I started to lose all of my coping skills that I used when I was stressed. I could no longer go to the gym, couldn't go for my walks in the park. And then I started to struggle at work. All while feeling really off, knowing there was something wrong but having no idea how to fix it. That was the worst, because people would look at me strange for the little jumps from the "shocks" I would get. No one could understand how I was feeling. And having no real diagnosis for quite a while wasn't easy either. Made me feel like I was going crazy. Then when I went to a rheumatologist at the Cleveland Clinic. She did all types of tests and when I went back for the results; and she explained Fibromualgia and Sjogrens disorder; I sat and cried. The feeling of relief was so overwhelming. Was like ok, I am not crazy, I am not imagining all of these symptoms. There really is something wrong with me. Not sure if anyone else can relate to this feeling. Luckily all of this was found out before we started fostering. But even now, I still have new symptoms. The one that bothers me the most is that I have no control over my feelings or reactions anymore. I at times blow up way to fast; and not at all the reaction I want to have. I use to be calm and be able to handle things much better. I have changed into a different person and I am still learning who I am. I know that my husband has not adjusted well to the change. He has constantly said how he wishes he could get his old wife back. But unfortunately that person is long gone. And at times I feel he is not liking this new me. Can't lie at times I am not really fond of this new version either. But think it will just take some time to get use to. I have always had a very high pain tolerance; so the pain is something I can deal with. But when I can't focus, I use to love to read, I can no longer read. When I have tried I am reading the same line over and over again, and have no idea what I read. I use to get lost in books and that was an escape for me. But no more, I have tried the audible books, but it isn't the same for someone who prefers holding the book and reading herself. There are times when I wonder if anyone else has the same feelings that I do, if anyone else feels alone and like none of this is fair. I would love to have my old life back, be able to go walking in the park with my dogs, ride a bike, read, not only feel good when laying in bed. I miss the old me as well; more than I care to admit. And with the kids it is a new learning experience, between learning them and learning what I need to do so that I don't have more bad days than good. And I do not let on to them if it is a really bad day. These kids would so take advantage and I won't let that happen. I still have the fight in me where I am in charge of my house. Several of the girls that have been in our house have wanted to be in charge and I have had to show them that is not an option. It has been a battle at times. But one that I will fight through daily. But with the kids it is tough when have very little energy and all I want to do is sleep. With all of this I have gotten myself a therapist; I feel so lucky to have found the one that I have. She tells me like it is and tells me if I am wrong about something. It is good to have someone that will be honest and open with me and help me handle and figure things out. But yet she does not make me feel like a failure. I was never one in the past that was a fan of compliments. But I do have to say I welcome them now. Sometimes, that is the only way that I know what I am doing is good and right. That I am helping these kids as much as them being with us is helping me. I have grown to love every single child that has been in our house. They are all very special in their own ways and yes they can teach me things that I didn't even realize I needed to know. I do wonder if anyone else feels the way I do; does not have to be due to Fibromyalgia but other unseen disabilities. There are so many out there. I was taught that you treat everyone with respect and the way you want to be treated; because you never know what someone else is going through. I was lucky enough to have an amazing Grandma who taught me so much about life and I hope that I can teach even a single thing that she taught me to these kids, then maybe they will leave our house better than the way they came in. And that is the way I choose to look at life. Will be back soon to talk about current day events and more reminiscing about anything and everything.

Next steps

Nov 15, 2025 4:17 PM

And Fostering Begins... We went through all of our classes, did our CPR and First Aide class as well. And then we got our foster home license in 2022. Then the waiting began. And finally in August of 2022 we were lucky enough to have FP join us in our home as our very first Foster Daughter. It was rough at first, won't lie. The training that you go through is informative; but never really say how it will be in real life. But again, I wouldn't change a thing. She is an amazing young lady and is so strong and determined. We were lucky enough to have her with us for over a year. It was tough watching her go; but we do this for the reunification with their families. Sadly in her case things did not go as planned and she was not able to stay with them. But I have faith that she will get through everything and be even stronger. All of the kids that come through my house leave with my phone number. I want them to know that I will always be here if they need anything. And to remind them that once they are in my house they are family and we will just be a phone call away. We did hear from FP a few times after she left; which really made my heart feel good. And it showed that she was paying attention and learned and grew while she was with us. She loved doing my hair I have so many pictures of the many hair styles by FP. So many memories that will be with me forever. Our first year we had a total of 2 girls with us and they both gave us a run for our money; but they each had their own struggles that they had to learn to deal with and fight through. Our second young lady was a teenager; wasn't sure how that was going to go; but EG was a tough young lady. As most of them; she came in feeling she was fine on her own and needed no one. She I will say was my toughest girl to this point. She was a runner, did not like rules at all. But have heard that she is doing great now and I could not be prouder of her!! I can only hope that during their time with us they were able to see that they are important and worth loving. I will be here for both of these girls if they ever need anything!! Since we started in 2022 we have had a total of 12 girls with us and 1 boy. Not only do I hope that they learned something during their time with us; but I know that each one taught us so many things. And reminded me each day why we decided to do this; because these kids need to know that someone is willing to fight for them. And they need to see that they are not bad kids that they are worth being loved!! Currently we have become Legal guardian of SS and her brother is living with us as well; and we will be getting legal guardianship of him as well. Will talk about the experiences with them as we go along.

The Beginning

Nov 14, 2025 11:18 PM

Our fostering and fibromyalgia story began in a rough way. It first started in 2014; I was lucky enough to marry the man of my dreams. That year was a good one but also a very rough year. That was the same year that we lost my mom. Which was very rough. I was lucky enough to have some very special moments with my mom. We got something that some are not lucky enough to get. Our family was able to say goodbye to her and she got to say the things she wanted to say to all of us. She had been in pain for so many years and was now ready to be pain free. But she also knew that it was a rough time for those that were going to lose her. After losing my mom things started to show that I was ignoring while I was taking care of my mom. My health started to struggle in 2015 and continue for the years ahead. I found out that I needed to have back surgery; during that surgery it was found that I had some nerves attached to my spine that did have to be removed. After that it was a struggle to get back on my feet and back to my normal life. It was a very rough time because I knew that there was something wrong; but had no idea what it was. I had doctors telling me that things will get better and it just takes time. But unfortunately over time I started to feel worse and things were not getting any better. I had an amazing job at Gateways to Better Living, Inc. and over the years I began to struggle with my job. Finally in 2018, I had to make the decision to leave my job; was a tough decision; but one that I know was the right one to make. Once I was no longer working I put all my efforts into finding out what was happening to me. I would get shocks in my hands, arms, legs and feet as well as in my head. I would have problems remembering things. I use to be so proud of being able to remember things. I still never recovered and was not able to enjoy the outdoors, my hikes had to stop, my independence became an issue. Finally in 2020 I was finally diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Sjogren's Syndrome. At that time I had no clue what all this diagnosis meant for my future. But I do know that it brought me relief and I cried when I was told that the problems were not just in my head. I had to deal with the loss of my job, my independence and a hole in my heart as to what I will do with my time. So my husband and I talked about what our options were to find something to keep me busy and my mind off of my medical issues. My husband and I looked into becoming foster parents. We made a decision to start the training to become foster parents. We finalized our training in 2022 and then officially licensed in 2022 as well. We were lucky enough to get our very first Foster Daughter FP later in 2022. And our amazing fostering journey began....

Create Your Own Website With Webador